This Christmas, get run over by a reindeer in "SANTA'S SLAY"!

Ho ho ho, HMN faithful -

Like snow through the hourglass, December is suddenly upon us.  Take a break from shouldering fellow mall patrons and hate-tweeting large corporations, and treat yourself to an early present -- "Santa's Slay"!

This 2005 holiday romp posits Santa not as a jolly gift-giver, but as a murderous maniac, the result of being the offspring of Satan.  It turns out giving presents was a thousand-year punishment for Santa.  Now that his obligation is fulfilled, the killing can begin anew.  But a boy and his grandpa still believe, and do everything they can to take him out like a Black Friday shopper.

It's wildly naughty fun.  There's great cameos from Fran Drescher, Chris Kattan, and James Caan.  Expect frightening reindeer, exploding presents, and a lot more red than green.





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Saturday, December 21, 2013
9PM (Doors 8:30)
NerdMelt Showroom
7522 Sunset Blvd.
Hollywood, Calif. 90046
Tickets: $8. in advance ($10. at the door)
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Get your tickets now at a discount -- we can be that awesome thing you do in L.A. before heading out of town, or just the beginning of a Hollywood Yule, where you own the mercifully traffic-less streets.  In either case, come early to our show and shop for some excellent last-minute gifts at Meltdown Comics.

As always, you can expect hilarious riffs, great stand-up (this month from Erik Charles Neilsen [Community, Conan]), and free popcorn!

And new this month are the Horrible Movie Night t-shirts, fresh from the printer!  They will be on sale at the show for the insane low price of $12.

Hit us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and our mailing list.  We have some killer stuff on tap for 2014 -- you gotta ride along with us!  We look forward to watching "Santa's Slay" roasting on an open fire.

Crappy holidays!

HMN

C.H.O.M.P.S. is a dog of a robot dog movie! Come roast it with guest co-host BOBCAT GOLDTHWAIT!

Is it November already?

It seems like October was just yesterday.  To wit, we will feature yesterday's view of tomorrow next week at our screening & roast of "C.H.O.M.P.S."!

The titular star of this 1979 film is a robot dog specially designed to fight crime (we may be Horrible Movie Night, but we could not bring ourselves to write "take a bite out of crime").  The inventor (Wesley Eure) & his girlfriend (Valerie Bertinelli) attempt to keep the metallic mutt out of the hands of a rival company, and its wacky henchmen.

We are very pleased to welcome as this month's co-host, actor/writer/director BOBCAT GOLDTHWAIT, who will join us onstage to present and further roast the movie.  Also joining us as special guests are star WESLEY EURE (Land of the Lost, Finders Keepers), and, to lend some cinematic legitimacy to the proceedings, legendary film critic BILL HARRIS (At the Movies)!  It's a stellar lineup that you cannot miss!

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Saturday, November 9th 2013

9PM (Doors 8:30)

Nerdmelt Showroom

7522 Sunset Blvd.

Hollywood, Calif 90046

Tickets: $8. in advance ($10. at the door)

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Grab your tickets now in advance at a discount.  As always, the best riffs of the evening will win special prizes.  As if all that is not enough, we will also have killer standup from DOMINIC DIERKES (Workaholics, Weeds).  And FREE POPCORN! 

Facebook.  Twitter.  Instagram.  Email list.  Do it.  See you soon!

HMN

This October, get pricked by Corey Feldman in "VOODOO"!

Happy kinda-almost-not-really-yet Halloween!

Huge thanks and welcome to all our new fans who made September's roast of "Sharknado" such a screaming success.  We're stoked to have you onboard for another outing into the waters of bad cinema.  For October, allow yourself to rushed into pledging allegience to 1995's "Voodoo".

Corey Feldman stars as Andy, who wants to be closer to his girlfriend when she enrolls in college, so he joins a very strange fraternity on campus.  A lot of dead bodies later, it seems his frat brothers are up to some occult shenanigans, and may not be -- well, alive. 

The movie also stars Jack Nance (Twin Peaks, Eraserhead, that Suicidal Tendencies video), and Sarah Douglas, who was Ursa in "Superman II".  It's also got voodoo dolls, elongated tongues, ritual sacrifices, and the long-awaited return to HMN of -- boobs.

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Saturday, October 12th, 2013

9PM (Doors 8:30)

NerdMelt Showroom

7522 Sunset Blvd.

Hollywood, Calif 90046

Tickets: $8. in advance ($10 at the door)

ages 16+

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Make sure to grab tickets in advance to guarantee yourself a cheaper price, and a great seat (although any seat with you in it is a great seat).  And don't forget to bring your funny, cuz the best riffs of the evening will win prizes!  Speaking of funny, we will feature comedy from some of the best stand-ups in town to help roast the movie even further.

Get down with all of our horrible day-to-day activities by following us on our various & sundry portals: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and our email list.  You'll be glad you did.  Reserve yourself some horrible seats, and come to the show, or we'll tickle your custom-made Etsy voodoo doll until you do.

Luff,

HMN

Too horrible for HMN! Exhibit M: "Desperation Rising"

There are movies too bad even for Horibble Movie Night?

Yes, Virginia -- there are.  This is another in our series of movies we meet during the vetting process for our show.  May we introduce you to "Desperation Rising".

A melangé of plot ideas, odd camera angles, and epileptic editing adds up to a bizarre mess that's more college video editing project than motion picture.  It's kinda a revenge tale of burned criminals taking out other criminals.  But it also chronicles the travails suffered by a group of prostitutes locked in a red-lit room.

The ADR sounds like the South Park kids imitating Bugs Bunny. The video effects would bring a tear to the eye of an Amiga 500. And what is the son of John Cassavetes & Gena Rowlands doing here?  Although he was in another movie cleverly titled "Farticus", so maybe the apple fell pretty far from the tree.

We normally say watch these movies with friends, and intoxicants.  In this case, stay away from the hooch, and watch it with an EMT team on stand-by.  You'll thank us.

News on our October 12th show -- coming soon!

HMN

SHARKNADO DVD release party/screening/roast with cast & crew!

Sharknado.  Enough said!

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Saturday, Sept. 14th, 2013
9PM (doors 8:30)
NerdMelt Showroom
7522 Sunset Blvd.
Hollywood, Calif. 90046
Tickets: $8 in advance ($10 at the door)
Ages 16+
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This will be the Blu-ray/DVD release party for the movie (releases Sept. 3), and it's gonna be a doozy.  The sharkmasters themselves, The Asylum, are donating prize packs for the evening, so sharpen those wits if you wanna win one!

We're also pleased to welcome cast & crew from the film (to be announced) who will join us onstage after the movie for a Q&A.  Our stand-up comedians for the evening are the Sklar Brothers (Sklarbro Country, United Stats of America), and Dan Telfer (Just for Laughs, The Onion).  You do not want to miss this show.

Buy tickets now before they're all eaten up (or blow away -- either metaphor works).  Follow us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and on our email list for updates on this and future horrible shows.

May all your sharks be roaring sharks,

HMN

It's Pacific Dim with KRAA! THE SEA MONSTER, sponsored by FULL MOON FEATURES!

Avast, bad movie lubbers -

We're back for August, and it's a goodie this month.  Our cinematic dartboard is 1998's "KRAA! THE SEA MONSTER".

The true horror of this film only begins with the grammatical atrocity of a rogue exclamation point in the title.  A giant sea lizard has been unleashed upon an unsuspecting New Jersey, and proceeds to stomp its way across the landscape.  A team of teen space cadets (for real) orbiting our solar system in a giant spherical battle station (totally not looking like the Death Star) monitors the situation.  Using space technology (and, for some reason, telepathy), they decide to send an alien agent to assist some random humans in helping defeat Kraa.

There's a lot goin' on in this picture.  It's actually a combination of two films, "Kraa!" being cut in with an unrelated film, "Planet Patrol." This is a technique used often by Hong Kong bad movie auteur Godfrey Ho. Look carefully to see if any of the characters from the two movies interact (spoiler: they don't).

We have a biker teaming up with a diner owner teaming up with an alien blob teaming up with the government to team up to defeat the wobbily kaiju.  There's lots of crummy miniatures, slow-motion destruction, and actors running back & forth to simulate shaking buildings à la Star Trek.  You'll also see Alison Lohman (Drag Me to Hell), and Stephen Martines (Burn Notice) in early roles.  It's a cornucopia of fun!

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Saturday, August 17, 2013

9PM (Doors 8:30)

NerdMelt Showroom

7522 Sunset Blvd.

Hollywood, Calif 90046

Tickets: $8 in advance ($10 at the door)

Ages 16+

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The good (yet evil) folks at Full Moon Features have graciously provided their support, and prizes for the show.  Wait 'til you see what they have for you!  Bring your knowledge of Full Moon's catalog through the years for a chance to win bonus prizes.  And follow them on Twitter, dammit!

We are pleased to welcome as our special guest Christopher Bergschneider, the special effects guru who worked on "Kraa!"  He's contributed to "A.I.", and "Tales from the Crypt", so we'll see what he has to say for himself at a Q&A after the movie.  Don't forget the killer stand-ups who will perform during the evening -- we have Shawn Pearlman (Comedy Palace, Uncle Mom), and Allen Strickland Williams (sketch comedy group Women) to help roll the hilarity along.

And of course, HMN wouldn't be HMN without you the audience there to riff the movie.  So grab those tickets in advance at a discount now.  This'll be a popular show, so get on it.  Facebook.  Twitter. Instagram.  Email list.  You know the drill.

Kraa,

HMN

July's HMN comes to life -- with DEATH MACHINES!

Happy July, HMNers!

We have an excellent summer and fall in the works for all lovers of great bad movies, so keep up with us on Facebook, Twitter, and our email list.  We kick it all off this month with a lovely gem from 1976, "Death Machines"!

There's a war going on between the Mafia, and the Yakuza.  The equalizers?  Death machines -- incredibly skilled kung-fu masters injected with a drug that makes them perfectly obedient killing zombies.  Under the control of the Dragon Lady Madame Lee, the aforementioned machines set about to thin the ranks of the Mafia's goons.  Once a survivor of the attacks (coincidentally, another kung-fu master) and the police get involved, things get even more kicky and punchy.

This is one of the best movies we've seen in a while -- from frame one, it's a stone gas.  Peep the trailer for a convincer --

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Friday, July 26th, 2013
9PM (Doors 8:30)
NerdMelt Showroom
7522 Sunset Blvd.
Hollywood, Calif 90046
Tickets: $8. in advance ($10. at the door)
Ages 16+
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Horrible Movie Night just ain't horrible if'n it weren't for you, the audience.  Your funny one-liners peppered throughout the film power the hilarity of the evening, and you might just win a prize for said funnitude.  You will be joined by two great stand-ups: Jake Weisman (sketch comedy group Women), and Kyle Clark (Nerdist Network's "Nerdterns").  Don't forget the free popcorn!

Find/follow/promote/love us.  Get tickets in advance here, and show the hell on up!  See you there!

Hi-yah,

HMN